In erotic and New Adult literature, shame plays a pivotal role. As an author, you can use this complex emotion to add depth to your characters and build tension. But how do you portray shame convincingly?
The Psychological Dimension of Shame
Shame is one of our most intimate emotions. It arises when we feel exposed in our vulnerability or when we fear we don’t meet (perceived) expectations. In erotic literature, shame can have multiple triggers:
- Insecurity about one’s body
- Lack of sexual experience
- Unexpected physical responses
- “Forbidden” fantasies or desires
- Social or religious taboos
- Unwanted exposure (physical or emotional)
The Protagonist’s Mental Landscape
When your protagonist experiences shame, their thoughts often circle around:
“What will others think of me?”
“I shouldn’t want this.”
“If anyone knew how inexperienced I am…”
“My body isn’t good enough.”
“This is so embarrassing, I want to disappear.”
These thoughts are characterized by self-doubt and a desire for invisibility. Let your protagonist express these thoughts through internal monologues.
Physical Manifestations of Shame
Internal Sensations
- Feeling of heat in face and neck
- Accelerated heartbeat
- Shallow, rapid breathing
- Tense muscles
- Tingling or numbness in hands and feet
- Nausea or butterflies in stomach
- Sweating
- Trembling
External Signs
- Flushed skin (face, neck, chest)
- Downcast eyes
- Hunched posture
- Crossed arms as protective gesture
- Nervous fidgeting with hair or clothes
- Quiet, uncertain voice
- Avoidance of eye contact
- Urge to flee
Using Shame Dramatically
As a Source of Conflict
Shame can drive both internal and external conflicts. A protagonist who’s ashamed of their inexperience might avoid intimate situations despite longing for closeness.
As a Catalyst for Development
Overcoming shame can be a crucial part of character development. Show how your protagonist learns to accept their “shameful” aspects.
As an Element of Tension
Use shame to build tension. The fear of discovery or exposure can intensify scenes.
Conveying Shame to the Reader
To convey shame convincingly, use various narrative techniques:
- Describe Physical Sensations
“Heat crept up her neck, spreading across her cheeks like liquid fire.” - Use Internal Monologues
“If he noticed her trembling hands now… If he saw how inexperienced she was…” - Incorporate Environmental Details
“The mirror seemed to stare at her, mercilessly revealing every insecurity.” - Slow Motion in Key Moments
“The seconds stretched endlessly as she waited for the ground to swallow her whole.”
Overcoming Shame
The process of overcoming shame can be a powerful narrative element. Show how your characters:
- Learn to accept themselves
- Experience support from others
- Recognize their vulnerability as strength
- Question societal norms
- Free themselves from toxic shame
Writing Techniques
- Sensory Details
Don’t just tell readers your character feels ashamed; show it through physical sensations and reactions. - Emotional Depth
Connect shame to your character’s past experiences and core beliefs. - Pacing
Use varying sentence lengths to control emotional intensity. Short, choppy sentences can convey acute discomfort, while longer ones can explore deeper emotional currents. - Contrast
Balance moments of shame with moments of acceptance or triumph to create emotional depth.
Shame is a multifaceted emotion that can add significant depth to your story. Use it consciously as a dramatic element, but be careful not to overuse it. The greatest impact comes when your characters’ shame feels both relatable and surmountable.
Remember that shame in erotic literature isn’t just about sexual inexperience or body image – it can touch on deeper themes of identity, self-worth, and personal growth. When handled sensitively, it can create powerful, transformative narratives that resonate with readers.
